An Irregular Regular Routine

Here’s how it begins, our waking hours: Hugs, check blood sugar, plan meal, determine portions, count carbs, calculate insulin need, select site for injection, give shot, cry, comfort, then eat, fret, devour information on diabetes, fret more as we regurgitate the data we learned to one another, promise to focus on what we can do at the moment, and repeat.

Our life at every meal. In the mid-afternoon. At bedtime. In the middle of the night when everyone used to be sleeping. It is what we think about, what we talk about, what we worry ourselves sick over at all hours of the day or night, struggling with the fear that in any one of those critical steps we’ll make a mistake. On the dosage. On the carbs. On how we react to the intelligence we collected. And always, always, there is the one nagging question: how did this happen. How?

Hugs, check blood sugar, plan meal, determine portions, count carbs, calculate insulin need, select site for injection, give shot, cry, comfort, then eat, fret, devour information on diabetes, fret more as we regurgitate the data we learned to one another, promise to focus on what we can do at the moment, and repeat.

Somewhere in the midst of all that is hope, but for now our focus is much more immediate and we are working hard to handle that well, Lia especially. Remarkably well for someone so young, so innocent. True, there are moments of anxiety, frustration and pain, mostly around the shot, but sometimes with the regimented snack schedule too, but she owns this and she knows that she owns it and I honestly hate that for her. I hate it. We all do. If only there were some way to take her place. But the hard truth about diabetes is that it is not hers to give away and she knows this. It is something that she has accepted and so this is what we must do.

Hugs, check blood sugar, plan meal, determine portions, count carbs, calculate insulin need, select site for injection, give shot, cry, comfort, then eat, fret, devour information on diabetes, fret more as we regurgitate the data we learned to one another, promise to focus on what we can do at the moment, and repeat.

To read more about the care of Type 1 Diabetes, please follow the link Type 1 Diabetes Control and Management.